Oh Christmas Tree…Oh Christmas Tree…I love when you are uneven:)

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. Until…

It happened so quickly, I heard a loud cracking sound.” Cindy, come quick the tree hit the ground.”

I jumped from my bed all tangled  in sheets. Wishing I was dreaming with my warm fussy sheepsheep. I couldn’t come quickly as my foot fell asleep. I hopped this way and that way letting out a big squeak!

I limped my way to Peter staring  at him in awe. He had one hand on the tree and the other hand with a saw.

Peter said, “We need to cut the trunk- hurry!! help me now!!” My first reaction was to give him smart ass bowtake a bow and perhaps a nice pow

I told you Peter you needed to level it off!  Look at this mess!! Why give me more stress? You need to listen to  your wife as she knows best. I will help you and then give you your rest.

It was a frantic sight with everything in chaos. The tree, the decorations , the lights and the star were now on the floor leaving a scar.

I closed my eyes hoping that Peter would saw right pass not taking a slice off my plump, savory ass. Although, it would not hurt to take some shedding off the top right and left cheek.

Once he was finished my ass would look so sleek.booty

He trimmed what he needed. The bark that was all. The tree was now standing ever so tall. This story my dear friends  from far and from wide. Trim your tree properly or you will go down in pride.

This adventure was complete for the night. We took hold of each other and held our arms tight. We laughed at our mess and at our stress.

The only thing left to do was to undress.undress

The lights from the tree glistened with glee while we lie naked close to the tree. I whispered in Peter’s ear so soft and so gentle thanking him for the bark that was so uneven -hoping that this would happen every Christmas season.

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house the only people stirring was me and my spouse. The tree was now secure held tight into position. We grinned, having no disposition.

Peter held my ass as he often likes to do. I smiled at the tree and said, “This happened because of you. I want to extend my appreciation for this night of procreation.”

I know the tree understood me as I felt its needles scratch my back. The tree let out his sap which poured from his tap.happy tree

My gift for you is to find a tree that is uneven and see what fun you will have  during this Christmas season.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight.

Love and Blessings,




All images from :https://www.google.ca/





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